Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Batman Killing People - Rybuttal

Hi Everybody!

It's time for another rybuttal.

I know you're all excited, but try to keep it contained enough to read the article.

A video was recently posted "confirming" all the people that Batman killed in Batman Vs Superman: Dawn of Justice. I had the unique pleasure of watching on a plane ride yesterday (because that way I could see it without paying for it again, good stuff), so this is pretty solid timing for a reaction.

I want to set the record straight. That video (Which you may want to watch before reading this, or don't, it's not my video) is slanted and biased towards a very broad view of killing. So let's get into some details:

Friday, December 23, 2016

Rogue One Spoiler Filled Discussion

Rogue One, directed by Gareth Edwards.

This is the spoiler filled version of this post.

If you want to stay spoiler free, turn back now!!

I'm serious.

Rogue One Spoiler Free Movie Ryview

Rogue One, directed by Gareth Edwards.

This is the spoiler free version of this review.

For the spoiler filled post movie discussion, click here!

Let's start with the basics. This movie is pretty awesome. I've seen it multiple times now (with different groups of people) and I've walked away satisfied every time. So the tl;dr version of this post is go see it, it's a great movie.

Thursday, December 15, 2016

Where The Hell Have I Been!?!

Well, it's a long story.

Or maybe it's short. I've been super busy with work.

Actual paying-the-rent kind of work.

Sorry everybody.

Friday, November 25, 2016

Bubbles, Borders, and Bouncing: Color Dap iOS Ryview

Color Dap, by 10k Bulbs LLC.

Ryan's Rycommendation: A great game for people who love shooting colorful bubbles at other colorful bubbles. Also great for fans of classic arcade style gaming. Bad for people who want a storyline, plot, or complex texture graphics. But then why are you trying to do that on an iPhone?

Monday, November 21, 2016

Electoral College Math and Voting Turnout Statistics

Hi Everybody!

Quick Disclaimer: I'm keeping this post mostly non-partisan (at least to the best of my ability). This is about straight up math and statistics.

Friday, November 18, 2016

Simpsons Friday - Season 1 Best Moments

Hi Everybody!

Most of you will know that I'm a huge fan of The Simpsons. It's roughly my age (I turned one during season 1, and therefore I am turning 28 during its 28th season), so I've always felt a kinship with it.

Anywho, I thought I'd start a Friday tradition by having a Simpsons related post. I'll be aiming for every 1st and 3rd Friday of the a month. We'll see how long that lasts (I don't want to get overly critical of myself, but don't hold your breath).

So I'm kicking things off from the beginning: ugly ole' season 1.

Here are some of my favorite moments:

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

Really Good Game - Really Bad Chess iOS Ryview

Really Bad Chess, by Zach Gage.

Ryan's Rycommendation: If you love Chess but hate how every game is the same, then download this app and start chessing. If you crave consistency (and sanity), you might want to approach this game with caution, but every chess fan (and even you other people) should try out this app, it's pretty solid.

Monday, November 14, 2016

PenguRescue - iOS Ryview

PenguRescue, by Toka.

Ryan's Rycommendation: A great game if you're a parent looking for occupy you're kid for awhile, a bit tougher if you're a casual adult app user; this game requires pretty undivided attention. If you have some time to kill where you can focus 100%, this is for you.

Not a great game if you hate penguins.

Wednesday, October 19, 2016

Peli Peli Kitchen - Restaurant Ryview

Hi Everybody!

I don't know if I've done a restaurant ryview yet, so I'll treat this like my first one!

If you live in Houston, you should definitely read this. If you don't, feel free to go to another article, because this is about a restaurant in Houston. Or travel to Houston and eat here. Or ignore me and don't eat here. I'm not your supervisor.

Monday, October 17, 2016

Thursday, October 6, 2016

Happy 200,000!

Hi Everybody!

Who makes these? [1]

Some of you might recall that I had a celebration post when I hit 100,000 blogger views. It took me 20 months to get there (quick math moment: around 5,000 per month).

I am proud to announce that I just passed 200,000 blogger views (yesterday, but who's counting). It took a mere additional 11 months to get to this one (around 9,000 per month).

Monday, October 3, 2016

The Confusing State Of Marvel Theme Park Rules

Hi Everybody!

So this is super off topic, but I recently looked into some of the details, and I wanted to share some of my findings.

Let's start with a brief introduction of what I'm talking about.

Back in the 1990s, Marvel was desperate for some cash flow. Their sales were doing the trick, or they couldn't afford the fat stacks of coke they had gotten used to, or whatever, and they needed money, so they started whoring out everything they could. They sold movie rights to some of their biggest properties like X-men (to Fox) and Spider-man (to Sony). But they also sold theme park rights to Universal (for their then-future themepark Islands of Adventure).

If this all seems kinda dry to you, don't worry, it'll get a lot drier by the end. So, you know, maybe moisten yourself before reading further.

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Where Have I Been?

Hi Everybody!

You know those times where a real, money paying job gets in the way of a hobby?

That's happening right now. That and life, you know.

Anywho, I'm still here, I'm still playing games, but things may be kind of scant for the near future. Hopefully I don't lose you to all those competitor sites who do the same shitty articles I do.

Wanna talk? Got a complaint? Can't live without my articles? Leave a comment.

Until next time,


Monday, September 19, 2016

Beautiful, Crazy, Sad, and Enchanting - Kubo and The Two Strings - Spoiler Free Movie Ryview

Kubo and the Two Strings, by Laika.

Kubo and the Two Strings (hereby known as Kubo so I can be lazier about it), is a stop motion animation film about a young boy who goes on a wondrous quest and does some magic.

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Pokemon Fire Red - Late to the Party Ryview

Pokemon Fire Red, by Game Freak.

For those of you who might not have ignored Pokemon for the past 2 decades, you probably already played this game and have fond memories of it (either in classic red or fire red). I, however, did not succumb to Pokemon's thrills when I was younger. That was mostly due to never owning a Gameboy. But now, using a very old Gameboy Advance, I'm playing Fire Red as my first Pokemon game ever (unless you count playing Pokemon snap at a friend's house, which I most certainly do not).

Monday, September 12, 2016

Schedule Ryvisions Again! - 09/12/16

Hi Everybody!

Quick update on the schedule again: After several instances of failing to release anything on Friday, I'll be focusing on the other days of the week for the time being.

And deals will still be happening despite a particularly poor track record. I get busy. And lazy.

Sometimes both!

Anywho, I'm assuming absolutely no one will come crying to me because I'm not putting out enough content. To both of the people reading this: don't worry, I'll do what I can to keep you entertained.

Thursday, September 8, 2016

Sweet, sweet torture - Lords of the Fallen Ryview

Lords of the Fallen, by Deck13 Interactive and CI Games.

Lords of the Fallen is a punishing RPG in the style of the Dark Souls games, where you lose all XP when you die (unless you bank it or make it back to your XP ghost before it dissipates into wasted time and shattered dreams). The game itself is about a convict who is fighting a bunch of monsters who are invading, for some reason.

Wednesday, August 31, 2016

A Vulcan's Wet Dream - Rullo Flash Game Ryview

Rullo, by Crescentyr.

Rullo is a logic and math based game that involves a grid of several numbers that you manipulate to add up to the values in the surround boxes. It's fairly simple, but it's a very nice math training game.

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Revised Ryviews Schedule - 08/30/16

Hi Everybody!

Yes, Ryvised seemed like to weird of a word to put in a title. Who know?

At any rate, you may have noticed that I've missed a few articles in the past several days. Most of that was unintentional, but yesterday I realized that the What Am I Playing Ryght Now? article was pretty much the same from week to week. So I'm making the following edits to my planned Ryviews Schedule:

Mondays: What Am I Playing Ryght Now?    Wildcard!

Given that this is a review website (technically it's a ryview website, but once again, clarity is important), I'd like to try to have a bit more of that. So, I will make sure I always (always being a non-binding term, but more of a stretch goal) have at least one game ryview every week, and usually more than that. So Monday will be part of that usually more portion. It may also have some random stuff. And it may sometimes be What Am I Playing, but not every week.

Tuesdays: YouTube something

No chances. I'm hoping to bump YouTube up to twice a week at some point, but no idea when, so if you're holding your breath until then, make sure you have some good lung capacity.

Wednesdays: Random Ryview

Game Ryview, in case that wasn't clear.

Thursdays: Deals of the Week

Now, I know I've done this before (and again, and again), where I'm like "Hey guys, let's make this happen again!" and then I never do.

Just like the last schedule I sent out a few weeks ago.

Well, I got 2 weeks straight. At least that's something.

I'm still trying for this. I want to make it work. Family, work, friends; those are all just roadblocks on the path to Deals!

Weekends: Wildcard!!1!

Friday through Sunday, I'll try to have another article. This may be an optional wildcard or free day though, because it's tough for me to churn one out on Friday. I'm guessing this will be a "hey, did more than 5 people read my blog this week? Maybe I should post something else" kind of article.

Let me know what you think (or don't. Screw you).

Until next time,


Sunday, August 21, 2016

Why? - Suicide Squad Spoiler Free Movie Ryview

Quick side bar: This is two weeks in a row that I've missed the day for my "Friday" article. So, from here on out, my wild card review will be slated anytime between Friday and Sunday.

How do you like 'dem apples? (or, you know, 'dem ryviews)

Suicide Squad, directed by David Ayers.

I'm keeping this mostly spoiler free, so you can read this before you contribute box office revenue to this monstrosity (I can't complain because I did it).

Where do I begin?

Thursday, August 18, 2016

Deals of the Week! - 8/18/16

Hi Everybody!

It appears that my deals article from last week has been lost to the seas of time... Not sure why, not sure what God I angered, but I'll try not to do it again, I guess...

Who wants to save some moolah? (money...I mean money)

Here are the deals for August 18th, 2016:

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Deeply Puzzling - Klocki Flash Game Ryview

Klocki, by Targaciej.

Klocki is one of those games where you're playing it for a little while, and you think to yourself "this is stupidly easy." Then, like a brick wall of shame and confusion, the game suddenly says "fuck you, you don't know me!" and throws some intense curve balls.

What I'm saying is it got better.

Saturday, August 13, 2016

Idris Elba is in Everything! - Star Trek Beyond Spoiler-Free Movie Ryview

Star Trek Beyond, directed by Justin Lin.

I want to start off by pointing out that this is a spoiler free ryview. But in my usual fashion, I'm obviously discussing the movie a little so if you really want to go in blind, then close this page and see the movie.

I'll wait.

*"The Girl From Ipanema" plays for 122 minutes (plus previews)*

Wednesday, August 10, 2016

Gotta Catch 'Em All (That Are Available On Your Continent) - Pokemon Go iOS Ryview

Pokemon Go, by Niantic.

I was going to explain what Pokemon Go is, but I figure if you're reading this you definitely already know or solidly don't care.

Monday, August 8, 2016

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Hilarity Ensues - Ghosbusters (2016) Movie Ryview

Ghostbusters, directed by Paul Feig.

To some, this movie is also known as "This movie looks terrible because I'm a sexist bigot."

I want to start with some frames of reference. Both this and the original were stupid comedies largely made up by a cast of SNL members and their friends about a group of scientists (and the black one) catching ghosts. Both movies, in my opinion, matched quite a bit of the current comedy landscape. And both made me laugh.

Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Starcraft II: Heart of the Swarm - Late to the Party Ryview

Starcraft II: Heart of the Swarm, by Blizzard Entertainment.

Comically, I purchased this game much closer to its original release date. But, for various reasons that are both confusing and boring, I didn't play it until now! Hooray!

So, it's time for another late to the party ryview!

Let's kill some space marines.

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

As Heard By Cortana #12

Hi Everybody!

She's back! Confusing-er than ever!

As part of my commentary lifestyle, I usually have a microphone plugged into my computer.

This sometimes means that Cortana hears things I say to my significant other that she thinks are intended for her.

As so, I present:

As Heard by Cortana #12

Thursday, June 16, 2016

The Perils of Starting a Shared Universe - Ryviews RyPort

Hi Everybody!

For those of you following E3, you may have seen the recent South Park game trailer, The Fractured But Whole.

If you haven't it, I'd recommend it even if you aren't a big fan of the show (I'm not). It has some nice digs at DC and Marvel. And it got me thinking about shared universes in general. So I thought I'd go into a bit of an analysis of why The Avengers worked so well, and why Batman Vs Superman: Dawn of Justice did not.

Monday, June 13, 2016

What's Inside The Box - Flash Game Ryview

What's inside the Box, by Bonte Games.

A written game ryview!?! What is this madness!?!

I'll tell you what madness it is. It's my madness.

And it's me trying to actually produce game ryview content again! I know you all like my movie ryviews (and if you don't, go to hell), but since the site is supposed to be "Ryan's Game Ryviews" I feel like I should get back to that a little bit.

Or not. We'll see where this goes. Anyway, enjoy...

Monday, June 6, 2016

Poe, You Look Different - X-men: Apocalypse - Spoiler Free Movie Ryview

X-men: Apocalypse, directed by Bryan Singer.

X-men: Apocalypse is the newest installment of the X-men movie franchise (now up to 9 I believe, if you include spinoffs). It is also the third entry in the First Class trilogy.

If you've read of the reviews, you'll know that they're mixed at best. Some reviewers say only fans will like it, some say no one will, and a small amount say it's pretty good. Lots of them complained about an overstuffed story, too skin-deep development, and a nonsensical villain.

I thought it was pretty good, although there were definitely a few missteps.

Ryan's Rycommendation: If you're a fan, it's a must. Lots of fan service and X-men funitude (it's a word, dammit). If you're a casual movie goer, exercise caution but I think it would be a fun popcorn flick for all of you.

Monday, May 23, 2016

Banjo Kazooie Full 100% Playthrough - Part 6: Freezeezy Peak, Kind of!

Hi Everybody!

You know how sometimes technology crashes and burns, forcing you to literally put a foot through your computer and call an ambulance because your foot is bleeding on the rug?

That didn't happen this time.

But technology did fail me. So here is the partial level 5, which is everything I could recover.

Maybe in the future I'll go back and make this much more 100%. Until then, stop complaining and enjoy what I could salvage.

Plus an intro where I explain this again on the video.


Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Putting Idle Peasants In Their Place - Zombidle iOS Ryview

Zombidle, by Berzerk Studios.

Zombidle is an idle game where you and some undead friends terrorize poor villagers. You destroy their house (and sometimes the peasants themselves when they run out of their dwellings on fire) and collect gold from their smoldering remains. You then use the gold to upgrade your clicking and your minions, much like similar games such as Clicker Heroes.

Thursday, May 12, 2016

MARVEL PARTY - Captain America: Civil War Spoiler Free Movie Ryview

Captain America: Civil war, directed by Joe and Anthony Russo.

This is a spoiler free ryview (w00t). However, as always, if you're ignoring all media and such about the movie, obviously turn away now.

Anyway, let's get right down to it. This was a great movie. I loved pretty much every minute of it, and that's saying something, because it contained a sizable amount of minutes.

Tuesday, May 10, 2016

As Heard By Cortana #11

Hi Everybody!

You thought this was over and done with?

Think again!

As part of my commentary lifestyle, I usually have a microphone plugged into my computer.

This sometimes means that Cortana hears things I say to my significant other that she thinks are intended for her.

As so, I present:

As Heard by Cortana #11

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Monday, April 18, 2016

Halo 5: Warzone Firefight Beta - Myview

Hello Hello! This is Ryan’s fiancĂ©e Micaela. If you’re a Halo fan you probably know the Warzone Firefight beta is going on right now through Tuesday evening. Ryan is still in Canada and missing the beta so I’m doing my first ever “Myview”!

Sunday, April 17, 2016

Trimps - Video Ryview

Trimps, by Green Satellite.

Feeling idle?

Why don't you sit down and do some resource management for awhile?

Or don't, who's checking.

Thursday, April 14, 2016

Wednesday, April 6, 2016

The Plot for Star Wars: Episode VIII

So, it's that time of year again where I decide to divulge the (erroneously fake) plot of a future movie.

See my plot for Transformers 5 here!

This time around, it's time for Star Wars: Episode VIII - Attack of the First Order Strikes Back to the Future! (in Technicolor)

As with my Transformers plot, there are real spoilers for Episode VII here. And a whole lot of fake spoilers for Episode VIII.

You've been warned.

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

Because it has 0 views! - Sentry Knight Conquest - Video Ryview

Hi Everybody!

I'm starting a new thing on my blog. In the past, I've tried to post some things on Youtube, some things on the blog, and some things on both (mostly that last part, but I get lazy sometimes).

But I've never really tried to have one help the other much. That's all about to change with my new series:

Because it has 0 views!

Big ol' fat nothing [1]

Basically, I will go to my youtube channel, find a video that's underperforming, and I'll post an article about it. It's to nag AND excite.

But, you know, mostly to nag.

Wednesday, March 30, 2016

WTF, DC!?!: Batman V Superman Spoiler Filled Discussion!

Batman V Superman, (directed) by Zack Snyder.

It's time for the spoiler filled discussion! I know you've all been anxiously awaiting the arrival of this post so you can hear all my opinions (like usual)! And I'm not one to disappoint!

Sometimes. Sometimes I don't disappoint.

Anyway, this time, I don't disappoint!

So, in case the title didn't warn you enough, we're discussing the movie. Spoilers will be around.

Lots of spoilers.


Spoilers about Batman V Superman.

Get out while you can.

Sunday, March 27, 2016

Seriously DC!?!: Batman V Superman Spoiler Free Ryview

Batman V Superman, (directed) by Zack Snyder.

So, you've probably seen the other reviews. You've probably seen the rotten tomatoes score. But you haven't heard this particular nerd talk about the movie yet. So buckle in and get ready for some definitely non-repetitive complaints about this movie!

I want this to be spoiler free, by the way, so if you're looking for how I really feel, go to the companion post: WTF, DC!?!: Batman V Superman Spoiler Filled Discussion! (will be updated with link once I write it, for now just read this and wait, trust me, you can do it. Be strong!)

For now, we'll stick with the spoiler free version.

Where do I begin?

Monday, March 21, 2016

Banjo Kazooie Full 100% Playthrough - Parts 1 and 2!

You would not believe how many people have said to me "Hey, when are you going to do a full 100% playthrough of Banjo Kazooie?"

Actually, you might believe it.

It's zero.

Anyway, enjoy Parts 1 and 2.

Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Wild Wasteland - Video Ryview

Wild Wasteland, by Gamezhero.

Usually I'll put a blurb about the game here or something to introduce the video.

But I'm feeling lazy today.

Just watch the video:

Friday, March 4, 2016

As Heard By Cortana #10

Hi Everybody!

As part of my commentary lifestyle, I usually have a microphone plugged into my computer.

This sometimes means that Cortana hears things I say to my significant other that she thinks are intended for her.

As so, I present:

As Heard by Cortana #10